AskJaycee # 7: Am I Normal?

AskJaycee 7 - Normal

This #AskJaycee initiative is for everyone who wants to ask me any random yet thoughtful question. Who said I can’t ask myself?

“Prof., am I normal?”

Growing up, I had a hard time understanding my surrounding, the people, and myself.

Why do some people laugh altogether on a joke I don’t find funny and why am I the only one who laugh on certain jokes most of the time? The worst part is that I laugh at my own jokes. Hindi ko tuloy maituluy-tuloy ang tawa ko dahil kahit walang words na lumabalas sa bibig nung nakatingin sa akin, sa klase ng tingin niya ay nababanaag ko yung comment balloon ng PowerPoint sa taas ng ulo niya na may nakasulat na “WEIRD”.

This made me ask my Philosophy professor one time, “Prof., am I normal?”

“Who’s the abnormal who told you you’re not normal?” he replied.

That’s when I learned that I am choleric and choleric-melancholic.

(Search on Google for the traits of those with choleric and melancholic personalities.)

It just so happened that I was in a place dominated by non-choleric and non-melancholic.

That feeling sucks, you know? Para kang inilagay sa isang kumpanyang may 10,000 employees na yung 9,999 ay nagyo-yosi break at ikaw lang ang hindi. Mapapa #SanaAll ka naman talaga.

Later in business, and in life, in general, I’ve learned that I don’t need to change my personality to be an achiever and to help other people become achievers, too.

I’ve been able to close 7-figure business deals, paid on the spot through an online merchant, through a non face-to-face communication. These customers haven’t met me in person and they’re from the other continents of the world.

I don’t think I can do that if I would try to bend over backward being sanguine or phlegmatic.

I had a boss who wanted me to be a crowd-loving, ever-smiling, always accommodating person. I felt like I was prescribed to take a Diatabs capsule for my headache. Damn it.

Would you like to know what pains me when I give in-person seminars?

It’s not speaking on the stage.
It’s not the live Q&A.
When it comes to these two, bring it on, man. Bring it on! I am ready more than what you might think. I will even answer the questions you didn’t ask that I think you should have asked. But what pains me is the fact that I am in a crowd, and I don’t even know if they’re choleric or melancholic like me.

What an irony, yes? I write a lot. I speak a lot. I record videos every day. But I am a self-confessed introvert.

Why did I share a part of my story with you?

I want you to know that if you’re the choleric or melancholic personality type like me, accept the truth that we all have our own worlds.

Don’t get offended when someone tells you, “May sarili kang mundo.”

In fact, I have a rebut to that.

“Yes, we all have our own worlds. My planet has 10 stars that revolve around it. It has 3 rings. It has 8 weird seasons. So, how’s the weather in your planet?”

Know that you’ll just have to find your niche in terms of audience and skills.

Based on my observation, there are more sanguine and phlegmatic than choleric and melancholic. That’s why in a world of social media, don’t get depressed when your social media friends don’t like or share your posts where you speak your heart out. Your existence does not depend on how many people like or share your posts.

You are unique. You are rare. If God wanted you to be phlegmatic or sanguine, he would have not made you choleric or melancholic. Come on, man. That’s common sense, right?

You have a gift that only you can give to this world that is made up of protons, electrons, and neutrons – including morons.

Lastly, don’t expect everyone to laugh at the same joke that you laugh at with. It’s not a sin to laugh at your own jokes. Malupit na talent ang matutunan kung paano kilitiin ang sarili. Take that literally and figuratively.

Jaycee De Guzman

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